Monday, September 29, 2008

Life Size is the Super Size.

Five Chapter Mini Book Entitled :Why it is hard to take life too seriously:
Non-Ficition, written by Jessi and Beatka, purely auto-biographical.

Chapter 1: Dating

How was your date last night?

With who, cookie?

With the guy with the little hand.

Oh. You mean the crippled?

oh wow. don't say crippled. say "handicapped".

....(pause)....OH! oh yes! I SEE now. makes the sense. because of his HAND.
yes, HANDicapped man was very nice.

Chapter 2: Office Drama

cookie, LOOKIE! there they are, there are da grrls!

yikes! The Barbie Army! quick. hide your chinese food! hide it!

wha? why!

because! they always give us that look like we are the fat misfit dental assistants.



we ARE.

Chapter 3: dreams and aspirations



we have to get out of here.

someday cookie, OOH how about to the Paris!, they have better croissants than this place i thinks.

no, i mean we have to get out of this coffee shop

why? i just got the tea, Cookie
HAH, tea cookie, like you are a tea cookie! get it?

beatka, LOOK at my SHIRT. i am COVERED in espresso here.
we NEED to GO.

oh my. that was dumf.
that what you get for being so round up in there.

Chapter 4: Advice on life.

Maybe I just should relax a little bit.

Cookie, it like I told you. No matter where you go your back be still your back.

Wow. That was really profound actually thank you.

Yes. And also, the mice never mind the bricks.

Hm. maybe you should have stopped while you were ahead.

No sense?

No. not really.

Mm. Ok. I tried.

Chapter 5: Heart to Hearts

Cookie. I has to tell you somfink else.

About my butt again?

No...but that still big.

Ok, then what. Hit me.

You will not going like it.

I've developed a thick skin. go for it.

Ooh the kay....your lips are vurry FAT.

You told me that last week already.

Oh. I did?


Oh. nevermindz then. carry on mys little dunkey!


Steve said...

You're going to owe Beatka a cut of your royaties...ooh, that's right, you don't get paid for this Blog! Hah! Didn't mean to rub it in. I know, you do it for the pure enjoyment of writing for yourself (and for us.) Thank you.

James said...

you crack me up jessi! i must meet this beatka character, it's a moral imperative.

the photo just adds to the awesomeness as well :)

Chris said...

It must be so much fun hanging out with Beatka all the time! Lots of wonderful material, that's for sure.

Nate Heldman said...

who wants thin lips???

Georgia (AKA g-bug) said...